It is the time of year to reflect on 2025 and the lessons it brought. As we begin 2026, it would be easy to make declarations about all the things I will change, but that rarely comes to pass. I will still stay up late and still drink too much coffee. With that, here are some of my reflections from the past year:

Don’t accept an invitation to every argument. There are people who enjoy baiting us, getting under our skin just to elicit a reaction. They will throw comments in our direction with the single goal of pissing us off. We have the choice to fall for it or not. I have found myself embattled many times because I took the bait. The truth is, we don’t have to accept an invitation to every argument we are invited. Arguments and debate can be lively, if the issues warrant. However, that is where we have choice. Arguing with people about the best car brand, or car tire cleaner is hardly stimulating. Fact is, you do not have to weigh in when you know it is not for you. Let it pass over you. It’s not worth your time.

Take time for YOU. It sounds so simple. Yet, many of us put aside what we want to do in order to please everyone else. As a parent this is commonplace. However, we can easily distance ourselves from the passions that burn deeply. Hobbies, sports, mindless activities that bring us joy can be forgotten in our quest to meet the expectations of others. We must take time for ourselves; to enjoy the mindless escapes that provide us with “me time”.  Others may call our activities childish, unproductive, etc. So what! Who cares!  The opinions of others should not impact your happiness. So if you want to knit, knit. If you choose to get eaten by mosquitoes while fishing by a pond, do it. Whether it’s reading, running, riding, or planting flowers is your pleasure, do it as a gift to yourself.

It’s none of my business what others think of me. We all have a need to be liked and accepted. But the reality is, “I am not everyone’s cup of tea”, nor do I want to me. We can waste so much time worrying about how our decisions and choices will be taken by other people. I did that for a large portion of my life. As a school administrator and coach, it was important to have the support of others.  Now, however, I do not wear those hats. It is in our nature to be critical of choices of others. The truth is, it does not bother me now. If I want to ride my bike in the rain, I do. If I want to sit on the deck all day drinking coffee and listening to a true crime podcast, I do.  Being true to yourself includes being fulfilled by what you want to do, not distracted by the shallow criticisms of others.

Know “your people”. We encounter many different people throughout our lives. Some have been longtime friends, some family, and others casual acquaintances. Life can throw some nasty things our way, things that will test us and beat us down. Those are the times that will determine who “your people” are.  Being family doesn’t automatically place people on your side. In each of our own little worlds, we get to determine who we let in and who we do not. Having friends who share our outlook and ideas, who share similar interests and perspectives allows us to associate with whomever we choose.  It’s your life; choose “your people” because it is right for you.

Live while you can. We all have regrets, and there are items on everyone’s bucket list that await. However, yes, the big however, most of us will run out of time. In life there are times when we just have things to do, that includes things we may not always want to do. But, we do come to a point, like I am now, where we can make choices and carry them out. I have taken on new things, while setting others asides for “later”. Guess what? Later is now. We are not guaranteed a certain number of days on this earth. If we have the means, and the time, then do the things you want, visit the places you’ve dreamt of seeing. Live to live, not wait to live.

I have the right to change my mind. Changing our mind is natural, and it is our right. At differing points in our lives, our likes and dislikes vary. If I change the car brand I buy, or the clothing style I wear, that is up to me. Our political choices may change (yes, Trump is an idiot), as much as the type of coffee I drink.  The thing to remember most is, it is my choice. If we live our lives according to the opinions of those who do not pay your bills, then we risk being discontented. Change is guaranteed, and the choices you make are entirely yours.

In 2026, we will face challenges, stresses, and heartache. But we also get to experience joy, passion, and happiness in many forms. Milestones of anniversaries, birthdays, and retirement will greet us. Quiet times of contemplation and reflection will be presented; embrace them. As I try to look ahead, I know time is limited, therefore I will live to the best of my ability, all the while being true to myself.