The optimist in me says Spring is indeed at hand. The object we call the sun seems to be making a regular appearance, and we can shed a layer or two of clothing. Bliss at its finest. However, one must always make room for caution as it is not unheard of for our geographic and climatic demons to conjure an errant brisk wind or, dare I say it, snowflake. I will go against the pessimistic overtone and look to Spring as a welcome and much needed friend.

As we look for closet space to store heavy boots, scarves, and bulky coats, we embark on a biannual rite of passage – decluttering. We all tend to have an excess of each type of clothing, hats, and dare I say shoes. We hang onto our favourite t-shirts, the outdated shirt “just in case”, and who knows what other long forgotten fashion icon lurks on our coat hangers.

Just as Spring (and Fall) presents us with the urge to declutter “our stuff”, it is also an opportunity to take stock and declutter our most precious possession – ourselves. As the seasons of the year change, so too do the seasons of our existence. The various stages and circumstances we go through bring earmarks of joy and celebration, but there comes with it aspects of our lives that have thrown us off track, brought unexpected and unwanted changes. If we do not periodically check in with ourselves, take stock of what we value, the journey we find ourselves on today can be riddled with latent obstacles that resurface, that clutter our path.

Self decluttering requires more than boxes and shelves. I tend to hang onto past events that do nothing for my well-being. Dwelling on events I never thought I would get through, or feelings of desperation that hit me to the core are difficult to wipe away. I ponder what I could have done differently, how I failed to realize I had better choices to make if only I could have had greater presence of mind. As a result, instead of handling the unexpected darkness with greater resolve, I grabbed whatever hat I could find that fit any given day.

When life gives you lemons, hold on, not so fast. Transitioning from difficult times has not always been automatic for me. I lament too much on supposed friends I expected to be supportive, yet I fail to recognize that maybe, just like the hat I have pulled from the closet, I have outgrown certain people.  That in no way infers I put myself on a pedestal, far from it. As we move from place to place, change jobs, develop new relationships, we are not the same now, as we were then. Yet, instead of glancing in the rearview mirror, we become transfixed on a long gaze looking back. Excessive reflection has the danger of reliving past judgement from others, attitudes that did not fully comprehend our life choices, all hanging on hooks begging to be decluttered.

Henry David Thoreau said, “I love to be alone. There is no greater friend than solitude.” As social beings, solitude is not as easily attained or valued. Yet, to confront demons, decisions, and choices, conversations with ourselves are what is most necessary. Our self-worth is not dependent on those who recklessly judge us. Knowing what you truly stand for, and who you stand with, requires us to assess what we truly value, and who we feel values us.  That sense of place and purpose only comes by being true to ourselves as we stand today.